Yawnn.

I dreamt about him.. it was a nice dream, until my father woke me up. >:(

Grr I'm practically killing myself wondering why I don't have the balls to talk to him!
Okay.. I will. Tomorrow. this Friday.. if he's ever alone. which is basically why I never try to talk to him.. he's always surrounded by friends.. and girls... it kills me inside. I'm constantly dying because of him. It's like suicide, because I can't fucking get over him. GRRRRRRR.

Anyway, I just woke up. Its a snow day today :D I will hopefully have dance tonight. Company auditions are this Saturday. My goal is to be 150 by then. Now, I'm gonna go check my weight and see how far away I am from my goal. (I bet it's bad.)

...................................................................

OHMYGOSHSAYITAIN'TSO! 150.8! I was expecting 155 or something! Tomorrow, if I'm still 150, I'll post ugly pics. But yay! I guess my new goal is to either maintain 150 till Saturday, or, of course, lose! I tell you, he's a big thinspo to me. I mean, I know I've said this before.. but I mean a year ago I was a fucking fatass 170's cow. Pig. FATASS. And now I've lost about 20 pounds! he must notice, because lately ... no, I won't fill my head/blog with those girl thoughts.

'Oh, he looked at me! He must like me!'
or
'Oh, he sat by me! He must like me!'

Yeah those were my exact thoughts.. stupid teenage hormones. WHY MUST YOU TORTURE ME SO.

I'll post later tonight to give you updates on meals, hopefully lack of, and dance. Bye for now. :D